I'm Not a Sick Comic; I Write Elegies.

I have a great affection for Mennonites. Unlike our wartime president--who name drops Jesus as his favorite philosopher like some freshman film student citing Fritz Lang as a "big influence" after seeing a poster for M--Mennonites actually attempt the difficult, humbling task of a Christian life.

They are one of the Peace Churches practicing pacifism both politically and personally and offering no resistance when unjust harm befalls them. But unlike their theological cousins the Amish, Mennonites make greater compromises with modernity. To me, using their faith as a ballast with which to navigate the fallen world rather than an excuse to set themselves apart from it is all the more admirable. I suppose it's my fondness for idealism over ideologues. Mennonites allow such worldliness as playing baseball and riding buses. Yet this was enough to invoke God's wrath? What hope do the rest of us have? I touch myself and eat pork. Sometimes while driving through spaghetti junction. That can't end well.

I know "His ways are not man's ways" and only letting bad things happen to bad people makes for a boring old testament so He's got to let the innocent have it now and then. Okay Lord, we get it. You've got the biggest dick. Now how 'bout letting some of your most sincere believers play a non-violent outdoor team sport?

God may be all knowing but sometimes I think He lacks emotional intelligence.